Are we having fun yet?
So, it seems knitting has yet more lessons to teach me on this project.
When I plot out the episodes for DestiKNITions projects, I set benchmarks within the pattern so that I’ll have something significant to share with you. I’m not convinced just my prattling on about 50 rows of stockinette will be entertaining for any of you. And I care about entertaining and informing you.
Sometimes, that goal is motivating. Other times, it’s downright oppressive. I can’t tell you how many times this week I’ve stared at the enormity of this project, fingers aching after hours of knitting (while other tasks went undone), and thought to myself, “It’s just knitting. This is supposed to be fun.”
I’m not saying it isn’t enjoyable—it is—but enjoyable on a deadline looses some of its charm. Saturday was my birthday, and as a gift to myself I set aside the whole day for making satisfying progress on this oh-so-late episode and binge-watching Gilmore Girls to get my mind in the small-town atmosphere I’ll need for my next book series. Me, the couch, the yarn, and the remote.
So why did I end the day near tears?
I kept feeling the pressure of needing to get to the end so I can block this and show you all the finished product before an upcoming trip. And then when I messed up and needed to rip out nearly an hour’s worth of knitting, it all just caved in on me. It was another one of those days where my husband just looked at me like “this is supposed to be fun for you, right?” Because it wasn’t looking like any fun.
So I have a decision to make. All those blogging experts tell me I need to be posting around twice a week (I try to post every four days) to be “engaging.” That makes sense, but on the other hand who wants to read a post that doesn’t have anything significant to say? Or that takes something I love and turns it into yet another pressing demand?
Force this issue, or let it play out at its own natural speed? Really, how many other parts of our life fall under the same quandary?